Yesterday was one of those mopey, sulky type days where my husband and I had one of those day long, strained "disagreements" about everything. To make matters worse our second wedding anniversary is three days away (21 March) and we planned to hole up in the central Drakensberg so I was hoping the sullen and grouchy mood would dissipate soon. The hubby went off to Patisserie class and after a satisfying day of filling,extractions, botox and dermal fillers I decided to go off on my own to the mall, gorge myself on cappuccino and spend a ridiculous amount of time and money at the Exclusive Books Store. I bought a few more Lonely Planet type books on Thailand, various magazines, some Terry Prachett, The Devil wears Prada and some Marian Keyes for my niece who turns 14 on our anniverasry. I wasn't too sure what to get her, I checked out the "young adult" section but all they had was a plethora of Vampire books. The 'teen books' looks so childish. And even though the hubby made me cross during the day on a continuous basis I still bought him a James Martin book . A last minute buy at the counter was The Racist’s Guide To The People Of South Africa (what a good buy!) .
|The cream was fresh, the biscotti was yummy. Yey.|
At the table next to me was a couple with their therapist!
|Blueberry Flap jacks with ice cream. I had one only,the hubby |
likes it so I took the rest for him (even though he annoyed me the whole day)
He came home and said that I drive him bananas but he loves me and he gave me a big squishy hug , I then proceeded to bawl my eyes out and nommed the Petit Fours, which gave me a sugar-rush headache.
|The hubby's first attempt at Petit Fours (spelling?)|
|Hi-laaaaaaarious book that I finished last night.|
A man at the table next to me asked in a disapproving voice
" Are you enjoying your book?"
The Racist’s Guide To The People Of South Africa (R103, Exclusive books, 144pages, October 2010)
This is a politically incorrect and exceptionally hilarious (absolutely hilaaaaaaaaaaarious)“guidebook” that identifies – and pokes fun at – the people of our beloved Rainbow Nation, the Racist’s Guide is written for all the South Africans it parodies. This book is pure, unabashed satire, noting from the start that “Blacks”, “English Whites”, “Afrikaners”, “Coloureds”, “Indians” and “Miscellaneous” are the primary races to be encountered in the land . It answers questions like:
• What does a stressed Black look like?
• Why should you never give a White woman a white-gold engagement ring?
• What do Afrikaans people do for fun?
• Why do Indian men always play sport in jeans?
• How do Coloured gangsters fare in the navy?
• What’s the best way to greet a Chinese South African?
I laughed at every line, giggling away at the Mugg and Bean. I just couldn’t put it down and I finished the book the very night I bought it. When the hubby got home after Patisserie class I tortured with readings from the book punctuated with “ oh babe you have to read this, It’s so funny” followed by me LOLing. Not sure but there are one or two Trevor Noah-type jokes in there as well. In essence this is an affectionate and humorous look at our nation’s diversity .
The author, Simon Kilpatrick was born and raised in Johannesburg, South Africa. After four years in the corporate environment, he resigned in 2009 to pursue his writing full time. When he's not writing, he's exploring the world with his backpack.
Here’s a few reviews on it :
“If not politically, then at least Kilpatrick’s book is hilariously correct. It’s a cheeky, comical, daring and delicious read that forces readers not just to accept other races’ weird and wacky cultures but also their own. And by the last page, while drying the tears of laughter from your face, you realise: we may all be crazy but at least we’re all South African” – Rapport
“The side-splitting humour of Simon Kilpatrick with his precise analysis of our rainbow nation leaves you with tears rolling down your cheeks as you visualise each character in true form. A must read” – The Weekend News
“Its funny because its true and that's why we love being South African… Hugely entertaining… A brilliant and light-hearted means with which to dissect our layered and wonderful population” – JHB Live
“What is it that makes us South Africans South African? Easy. Racism. And this book shouts out all those things that we secretly think. Which may not be PC, but it's honest and hugely entertaining – and quite possibly what we, as a country, need” – GQ
“This politically irreverent handbook highlights South Africans’ quirks, habits and ‘cultures’… readers will delight in seeing how they fare among their fellow demographics. This unofficial endorsement of our beloved people would come in handy for visitors and expatriates returning to our shores” – Cape Times
“A riotous directory of all that’s obnoxious, quirky and hilarious in the Rainbow Nation, and a highly entertaining read” – SA Jewish Report
"Pale faced newspaper editors may walk delicately on egg shells as they arse-lick their new masters and pray that they can hang on until retirement but Simon Kilpatrick doesn’t give a toss. With refreshing honesty he takes the piss out of the lot of us. Which makes this one of the most democratically “racist” books ever to have appeared. It’s a splendid collection of offensive stereotypes assembled for the great amusement of those of us who don’t wake every morning and nurture our inferiority complexes. For that very reason this book is unlikely to appeal to the likes of Justice Malala, Max du Preez and Xolela Mangcu… It will be the best R100 you’ve spent, I promise you" – David Bullard, NewsTime
“The Racist's Guide To The People Of South Africa is politically incorrect and it's going to offend a lot of people, but this is just so damn laugh-out-loud funny we don't care… No-one's safe in this love-it-or-hate-it book. We love it” – Get It